The Earliest in "Classic" Rock

What have they done to my song, ma? And don't get me started on the price tag stuck on this cover!

Now for a 180 of sorts from the last post. Here's that rock 'n' roll feel of the 1950s...applied to music from the 1750s. Or thereabouts.

101 Strings' Back Beat Symphony was famous for trying to meld the rock 'n' roll sound to classical music. This album, J. Gaines's Rockin' The Classics Suite, was not quite as famous for doing the same thing, but it does have a more interesting backstory.

Rockin' The Classics Suite was on Golden Crest Records, a Long Island label known mainly for its classical releases. But one major exception to that was a high-school-age group that Golden Crest's owner discovered on a trip to Washington state. The group was The Fabulous Wailers, and their hit Tall Cool One made rock 'n' roll history after the group drove cross-country to record it. If not for The Kingsmen, many say The Fabulous Wailers probably would have been the ones that made Louie Louie a hit.

The pieces here on Rockin' The Classic Suite were hits a couple hundred years before The Wailers. In fact, this album was released a couple years before The Wailers got their first national exposure. This 1957 Billboard blurb calls the album "very amusing," and if you're into stylistic mashups like this, it is. The liner notes (written by "Punk Cadenza") play the rock bit to the hilt. The last paragraph: "The guys on this date are some of the greatest. They really are. On one of the playbacks one of 'em thought he heard a funny whirring noise comin' outa the speaker. At first they couldn't figure out where it was comin' from - then one of them pinned it down. He said it must be the noise of these composers rockin' in their graves!"

J. Gaines gets the credit for this album, but the supporting players are lost to history since they went under names like Serge Sputnik and Mose Ligature.

As for Golden Crest, they're still around. Music historian and author John Broven married the founder's daughter and has great info on his site. Much of Golden Crest's back catalog is still available, but this album doesn't seem to be part of it.

Here's Liebestraum:

You might recognize this one from Allan Sherman's Hello Muddah:

The Latest In Rock 'N' Roll: The Earliest in Counterfeit Music

It's not always easy to tell a counterfeit. But sometimes you come across something that just screams it's fake. Even if you have to turn it around for it to start making noise. And this album's gonna get loud. Oh, it's a real record, and there's real music on it...just not the exact music '50s kids were clamoring for. And as you'll find out later, the music's not all that's loud on this album - one of the earliest from a genre I call "rocksploitation."

You've probably seen it on TV innumerable times: Now That's What I Call Music has done over 50 albums of repackaged hits. K-Tel, Ronco and Adam-VII used to do the same thing. They were pretty top-tier since they were all from the "Original Hits, Original Artists" school. Lesser labels like QMO and Pickwick had in-house bands to re-record popular songs, and occasionally rewrite a few lyrics to avoid having to pay royalties.

Then you had the bottom of the barrel: the strictly no-name bands on strictly no-name labels trying their damnedest to cash in on whatever was popular at the time, artistic integrity or even ethics  notwithstanding.

OK, let's dissect all this:

16 COMPLETE SONGS
That's the first clue you've got something a little bit special. They're bragging that you get to hear 100% of every song!  They recorded every note. In fairness, I point out that that didn't always happen with albums like these.

ALL OF YOUR FAVORITES
"OK, uh...Let's Go? The crystal ball lady said that won't be a hit for a few years yet. Round Robin? I don't remember the words exactly, but that doesn't sound right. Low Man? Stampede? Blazing Home? Well, now it sounds like I bought a country-and-western album! What's going on here? And I've never heard Moon Dream and Sky Rocket on my transistor radio before. I must have the wrong station on. Where are those 'top hits and current favorites' I thought I was getting?"

MUSIC FOR DANCING
I know I didn't ask for any of these songs, but yes, I guess you can dance to them, so technically they may have been honest about that.

And speaking of "technically:" I cleaned this record before I dubbed the two tracks you're about to hear. These budget labels were not well known for sound quality, despite what some of them would have you believe. I've even heard of some labels recycling their vinyl, melting it down to be pressed into other records. I can't help but wonder if this happened here...or whether people who bought this record wished they could do.

Here's that little-known gem, Jump The Gun. How many defenseless sax reeds had to die for this one?


I think someone deserves a Time Out:

'Twas the day after Christmas...

And all through the - nah, I can't. But I can share a couple more unusual, if not downright rare, Christmas 45s.

First, Dodie Stevens, who trades her tan shoes and pink shoelaces for a holiday gown as she croons Merry Merry Christmas Baby:


And a surprise from Brook Benton. I never knew he recorded any holiday songs, and I've never heard this one: This Time Of The Year, on Mercury.